I tend to not listen too well when people speak to me about my blog. Possibly because I usually write it without an audience in mind, and am thus a little startled when people strike up a conversation about how I write it. However, someone wrote me an e-mail the other day, suggesting that I should treat my blog more kindly.
She is right, of course.
One of the things she pointed out was that I do not give very much of me, of what happens in my life. That the blog receives only disjunct ponderings on stuff that I have been internalizing, making for a rather bland and confusing read for other people. I agree. She's absolutely right. And although that is exactly what I had meant for this blog to be, I think it is time for a slight change. For one thing, I have myself become bored with writing the thing. Possibly because it isn't the same outlet that it used to be. Also, aside from my next-door neighbor, I do not think that I know any of you who read this regularly now. That only compounds the boredom of those people. You people. Which actually brings me to another point. I am constantly amazed at why all you people read this stuff. And write back, asking for more. I mean, disjunction and confusion aside, this drivel is so persistantly gloomy, boring, and pessimistic that it should have long since put you all to sleep. Or triggered the onset of depression. Or something. Why do you stay? What could this blog possibly be doing for you? Perplexing. But back to the point.
I am going to try out two changes. First, I am a movie buff. I watch a lot of them. Not just because I am alone a lot. I have always loved movies. Books I like, poetry, music, ballet, and even the odd painting. But movies I love. Good movies, obviously. Which makes bad movies even more of a letdown, because they feel like an opportunity lost. I mean, all this money, talent, time, people, and film, just to make National Treasure, when you could have been making Am/eacute;lie, to waste it on The Ring instead of striving for Ringu, or settling for Swordfish instead of trying for another Brazil. So. My first change to this blog, in order to give those of you who actually bother to come back here, day after day, to read the ramblings of a man you do not know, is to talk a little about the movies I see. Each day. Now, these will not be reviews, so they will actually not be of any use. Except maybe to give a little bit more coherent picture of me. Perhaps.
Secondly, I am going to try to be better about telling you what is actually happening in my life. And thus possibly gaining back some of the nice feelings I used to have for this blog. This part of me. Because, frankly, I have never been that good at being good to me. Which is silly. Since that is what you should do.
Be kind to yourself.