Monday, May 5, 2003

Back home. Which is good. I missed my wife like crazy during this last week. She may be undergoing a change, due to alterations in her hormone levels, caused by the pregnancy. But I am changing too. In some weird ways.

I've always missed my wife when I'm away from her. But this time, it's different. It doesn't just feel uncomfortable. It really hurts. It's akin to having this tight knot in your stomach. Constantly. Not good. I just want to be there all the time. Protecting her. And our baby. Somehow. Tell me this isn't some damned hormones.

And it's spreading. Into other areas of my life. For example this headache with the car. You would think that I would be looking at buying something really cool. Since I need to buy another car anyway. Right? Wrong. All I can think about is reliability. And security. Dependability. Sensibility. 'How many airbags does it have?' 'Does it do well in crash tests?'. I've actually heard myself asking 'How many miles does it get to the gallon?'